girlsdontcry's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Life is light. Sometimes people surprise you, and sometimes people even surprise you in good ways. I was going to talk about something else and now I'm not, it's not mine to talk about. But I can't help wondering ... well, about everything really. I am mine to talk about and so is this place. This city. This city of mine. Life here is so light. It's not like where I'm from, where things seem to matter so much. It's so beautiful like that. The things that matter so much there do not matter so much here. That makes more room for pleasure, for art, for beauty, for thought, for friends, for drinking. This is not a city of big love. The romance here is in other things. It's in walking down some amazing street, in crossing the river as the sun is coming up. The romance is in an alcoholic picking food out of a bin while an impossibly glamorous, beautiful woman passes by. There's less pressure here. People expect less of each other in a way that is a huge relief. I hardly go to people's houses. I have friends I have known for years here, whose houses I have never been to. I have friends I have known for years here and I don't even know what their addresses are. It doesn't mean they are lesser friends though. It's just different here. People from home say things like: "I hadn't heard from you for so long I thought I must have done something wrong," and I just don't understand it. Here, you take what you get; you can't need anyone too much. And when there is a warm, unexpected gesture, it's a surprise. A good surprise. Here, when you're drunk and its 11pm and you're in the pub and your friends tell you they love you, they do mean it. You mean it too. It just doesn't mean anything. Or is it all just me, me and my inability to care. Me and my laziness. Is it bad? I don't know. 12:23 p.m. - 2002-08-02 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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