girlsdontcry's Diaryland Diary

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Holiday from myself

The problem with where ever I go, whatever I do, whatever new life I can come up with, is that I'm still there.

I can change my surroundings, my job, my country, my hair, but whatever is different, there's still me, the same.

I always think I want to live ten different lives, different jobs in different cities, learning different things. But really, I want to be ten different people, none of whom are me.

It's not that I hate myself, not today. But I know how this goes, it's lost the romance. I still want to know what happens at the end of the story, but I'm tired of ME being everywhere I go and just being so goddamned ME about everything I do.

Everything feels so the same, and I feel restless for change, for adventure right now. But I'm feeling hopeless about that because I'll still just be me. Grr. It's not that bad, but it would be nice to have a change for a few days -- even just so I can be relieved to get back to being myself.

9:29 a.m. - 2003-06-13

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