girlsdontcry's Diaryland Diary

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The cherry-flavoured entry

You know, chicken-flavoured anything doesn't taste like chicken, and strawberry-flavoured anything doesn't taste of strawberries, and Airwaves vapour release cherry menthol-flavour chewing gum most certainly does not taste like cherry. But I think the problem with it, really, is that it doesn't even taste like cherry-flavoured anything.

Salt and vinegar-flavoured crisps taste of salt and vinegar though, so that's something to cling on to in these turbulent times of ours.

I'm really very much looking forward to seeing Kill Bill in the very near future, although probably not in the next week, although maybe I will. But I'm worried.

I'm worried that Uma Thurman just won't be great in it. I'm worried about this because ... she's just not really a great actress, in my opinion.

People might not agree with me. I put this motion to the floor the other day (well, I suggested it to two of my colleagues) and they disagreed. But they are men, so I'm concerned that they've just not noticed.

And to be honest, I'm basing this opinion almost entirely on "The Truth About Cats and Dogs", which was on TV the other night, and "Dangerous Liaisons". I just think that people don't notice in "Dangerous Liaisons" because Uma Thurman has scenes with Keanu Reeves, so her awfulness is just eclipsed by his.

I know she was in "Pulp Fiction", but I just can't remember her that much. It's hard to put my finger on what it is about her that I don't like... her voice is kind of not that nice. And I don't know, I keep seeing the poster of "Kill Bill" where she's trying to look really proud and vengeful, but I think she only succeeds in looking like she's trying to look really proud and vengeful.

If you know what I mean.

But maybe I'm wrong -- it's got really good reviews.

Also, Uma Thurman was in "Even Cowgirls Get The Blues", which was supposed to be so bad that it didn't get even released at the cinema in Australia. Which kind of makes me want to see it, but perhaps the moment has passed.

Which reminds me of Joe Queenan, a journalist/critic who is so so funny, he wrote this book, which was called "America" here, but something different in America, in which he coined a term I have forgotten, a German term that started with "Scheissen" and it mean "shit regret", which was the feeling you had when you saw something that you hoped was really going to suck really badly, but actually only turned out being moderately bad. Scheissenbedauern! Thank you Google.

Anyway, that was what stopped me from seeing "Gigli". What if it wasn't really as bad as I wanted it to be? What if it didn't live up to the awfulness of "Showgirls"? Or "Under A Cherry Moon"?

So, well, I don't know. I guess I can try and get it on DVD or something.

I feel, inexplicably, or even maybe slightly explicably, but not really because I don't really understand, shit. How are you?

11:37 a.m. - 2003-10-09

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