girlsdontcry's Diaryland Diary

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Ennui! The Musical

It's one of those days where my head feels like it's stuck in a cloud and is only hearing/seeing/feeling things at a quarter of their impact. Because I'm not feeling very well.

Even though it's my body that is sick, it's my head that suffers the most.

The only thing to do ... carry on, make out like everything is OK, make plans for when I'm feeling normal again, then, I will be feeling normal again. Normal!

I think the day can be best summed up by the word "ennui". And that makes me think of Emily Dickinson:

I heard a Fly buzz -- when I died --
The Stillness in the Room
Was like the Stillness in the Air --
Between the Heaves of Storm --

Although I always think that it will be a fluorescent light buzzing ... is that a poem too?

Whenever I'm sick, I think I'm dying, but I think I'll probably live through this. If I look both ways before I cross the road, that is.

12:04 p.m. - 2003-08-18

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