girlsdontcry's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- If you see me staring in your window I'm trying to steal your life not your PlayStation I need to get out of this, I want a home proper home. With matching carpet and curtains that fit the windows, and not filled with the leftover crockery and cutlery and stolen pint glasses of other tenants, and cheap lightfittings chosen by cheap landladies who think they're somehow making it nice, when they don't give a shit. I'm sick of limescale and badly fitted Linoleum. God how I'm sick of limescale, it's an insidious enemy getting in everything, so hard to get rid of. I'm sick of beige and of woodchip and of mysterious stains that are better left unconsidered. This time of year, because it's dark so early, and living where there are lots of houses, I just feel so wistful walking along the streets and looking in people's windows at their nice, proper homes, with their painted walls and matching lamps, new sofas, books on bookshelves, pictures on walls, cushions, their homeliness. But I just don't know how to do that, even if somewhere was mine, was new, was nice. I don't know, my favourite place I lived was the tiny apartment in Hong Kong, a converted office, so studiously neutral in decor as to be offensive. It was completely impersonal, and I kept it that way. At least I only made it personal through my effects, not through my design. I keep thinking of the words to the song "That's Life"... I dont' know, I think that I just give myself a year to get out of this and then if it doesn't work, I give up, I'll just drop out then. But I'm a journalist, I need my deadlines, right? 5:16 p.m. - 2003-12-05 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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